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South Park: Protect Your Balls is a tower defense video game developed and published by Ubisoft. It is based off the American adult sitcom South Park.

The game was released on June 8, 2018, for iOS and PC, and received mixed reviews, with some criticizing it for being a rip-off of Plants Vs Zombies, another tower defense video game, and for having similar gameplay to that of another South Park game, South Park: Phone Destroyer.

Story

In this defensive video game, players must once again play as The New Kid, and arm themselves with an arsenal of tough front yard fighters to fend off the evil lurking just across the street, that want to break into your house and kick your balls. Players must use magic, which allows their minions to grow, and have strategic placement and timing, in order to... protect their balls!

Gameplay

The player‘s main gameplay area is The New Kid’s front yard, which is just across the street from the school, where the ‘evil creatures’ assemble. In order to protect themselves, they must collect magic, which falls from the sky every now and then, in order to place minions, most of which can fight any enemies that wander onto their yard.

There are five level sets: Day, Night, Pool, Fog, and Roof. Day takes place in The New Kid’s front yard. Night is the same, but at night. Pool takes place in The New Kid’s backyard, with their pool becoming a part of the area that minions and enemies can enter. Fog takes place in The New Kid’s front yard, with fog covering most of the yard. Roof takes place on The New Kid’s roof.

Characters

Protagonists

The New Kid

The New Kid is the protagonist of the game, who the playee controls. He is in charge of protecting himself from enemies.

Mr. Mackey

Mr. Mackey is a guide in the game. He teaches the player how to play. He shows you how to collect magic and place minions. He also announces any mini-games or other things that happen during gameplay.

Minions

Below is a list of minions and their abilities.

Minion name Abilities Unlocked at Magic cost
Pea-Wee Your first line of defense, this puny first-grader shoots down enemies, one pea at a time Tutorial 100
Grand Wizard Provides magic that helps create minions 1-1 50
Awesome-O 4000 His Cartman-shaped body works as a shield that can protect minions from enemies for long periods of time 1-2 50
Bill and Fosse Arms linked together and bombs in hand, these guys blow up nearby enemies with a very gay explosion 1-3 150

Enemies

Below is a list of enemies and their abilities.

Enemy name Abilities Strength Speed First appearance
Stan Marsh Normal enemy 10 hits Slow Tutorial
Kyle Broflovski Hat provides additional defense 30 hits (20 hits for hat and 10 for self) Slow 1-2
Eric Cartman Big bones provide plenty of defense 40 hits (30 hits for hat and 10 for self) Slow 1-4
Butters Stotch Merrily skips over first obstacle he encounters 30 hits Medium (slow after jumping) 1-6
Kenny McCormick Has 3 lives before dying 30 hits (10 for each life) Slow (human life) medium (skeleton life) fast (ghost life) 2-1
Mike Makowski Uses his vampiric powers to teleport across the yard) 16 hits Slow (fast when teleporting) 2-3
Randy Marsh Takes a big gulp from his beer and charges across the lawn 20 hits Slow (extremely fast when charging) 2-5
Towelie Stumbles around, holding an edition of The Daily Vape. Destroy his newspaper, though, and he'll go sober 30 hits (newspaper) 20 hits (without newspaper) Slow (fast when newspaper is destroyed) 2-7
Tom Brady Runs towards the players house. Speaking of runs, the more he’s hit, the more he craps his pants, which slows him down. 90 hits Extremely fast (slows down as he’s 2-9
Ducky Tubers Pool counterparts of Stan, Kyle, and Cartman that can go in the water Same as normal counterparts Same as normal counterparts 3-1
Larry Feegan Swims underwater (well, tries to) and is protected from most minion attacks until he rises to attack 30 hits Slow 3-2
Timmy Burch Rolls over anything in his way, instantly destroying it, and his wheelchair leaves behind a trail of oil 60 hits Medium 3-4
Handicapped Kids Follow Timmy’s oil trail, attacking anything in their way 10 hits each Slow 3-4
Kanye West Rides his little gay fish across the pool, jumping over the first obstacle he comes to 20 hits Fast (slow after jumping 3-6
Starvin Marvin Uses his balloon to fly over the players defenses. 1 hit (balloon)

10 hits (self

Fast (slow when balloon is popped) 4-1
Ze Mole Digs his way to the back of the lawn, allowing him to attack from behind 60 hits Extremely fast (very slow after digging) 4-3
Henrietta Biggle Uses her cigarette to create more fog and stun minions 30 hits Slow 4-5
Peruvian Flute Bands Travel in pack stocks of 3 and play annoyingly loud music that will stun minions momentarily, unless it is drowned out by something louder... 10 hits each N/A (remain in place) 4-7
Visitors Fly down in their spaceship and beam up minions if their tractor beam isn’t dealt with first 20 hits N/A 5-1
Dougie Stuck in a barrel that is a literal ticking time bomb, this little ginger marches towards minions and explodes when the timer runs out. Take him out! 60 hits Slow 5-3
Jimmy Valmer Uses his crutches to allow enemies to climb over defensive plants, but also renders himself stationary and vulnerable by doing this 30 hits Slow (stationary after using crutches) 5-5
Mimsy A gargantuan beast who steps on and crushes anything in his way, and throws stowaway Nathan as his last stand 300 hits Extremely slow 5-7
Nathan Gets thrown by Mimsy deep into the players defenses. Very high speed, but very low health. 4 hits Extremely fast 5-7

Bosses

Bosses are gigantic enemies encountered on the tenth and final level of each stage. They have extremely high health, and can use many attacks summon enemies from that stage or previous ones.

Below is a list of bosses.

Boss name Abilities Health Fought at
Sheila Broflovski TBA 150 HP 1-10
Satan TBA 430 HP 2-10
Gay Fish TBA 625 HP 3-10
Princess Kenny TBA 870 HP 4-10
Mitch Connor TBA 1250 HP 5-10